there you go...

We went on a spur of the moment picnic last sunday. a place where we go every once in a while. big trees, swings, grassy area, right in front of a big mountain. this time i brought my camera. it was a beautiful day and the girls played tag and the dogs sniffed out every corner. i loved it. a day that makes me thankful for being a mom and having great kids.

the big day is tomorrow. picking up dallas at the airport and then hanging around until brianne and jeff fly in from utah. all my kids together for mother's day. i haven't had that for at least 2 years. so excited. when i think about seeing dallas i start to cry. hopefully i will be cried out before he actually gets in.

i was thinking about being a mom today and what it means. it isn't my whole life--but it is one of the biggest parts of my life. there's the mom part/the wife part/the me part. trying to balance those three is huge. life is huge. sometimes i feel like i am being swallowed whole by it all. but i love it. love the challenges, the rewards, the ups and downs. one of my biggest fears in life is routine. having everything the same all the time. that's why i don't do fly lady, that's why i like to move, that's why i hate making plans--cuz something better might come along. but being a mom--absolutely nothing routine about it. yeah, there's laundry, school, homework and cooking and cleaning. that can certainly get routine. but the kiss on the forehead, the back rubs, the staying up late and talking, the shopping, the drawings, the giggle fests and the knock-knock jokes, ice cream nights, dancing to music, and all the other unexpected little things. those make it all worth it.

happy mother's day, a little early, to all...L